You deserve it, as a basic product of your existence. If you had it all figured out right now, the rest of your life would be boring. You have to give yourself a break. The biggest cure for your issue is going to be time. You are allowed to set and keep boundaries. Right now you are not in love. But the fact is that we really love and care for each other. Give yourself the chance to adjust to no longer living with a group of your closest friends yes, you will adjust. Give your relationships the chance to evolve. Pay attention to what they do, not what they say. I think you have a bigger issue, and that is the issue of maturity.
If he is the one, are you willing to put off marriage until he completes his education? You still deserve to live and enjoy your life. Your future will come soon enough. Make sure he is reciprocating—in all aspects of the relationship. Every single person you meet, interact with or think about in the course of a day has almost definitely had a period of their lives where they had NO clue what they were doing. This will be true most of your life, but less so than it is right now. Everyone has made at least one big, huge mistake that they wish they could take back. Losing friends is a natural consequence of this stage of your life. You still have so much time to fail. If you had the rest of your life locked and loaded at twenty-three years old, the rest of your life would be a let-down. The ones who point out your flaws or highlight your insecurities are only doing it to distract you from their own. And the truth is, now is the best time imaginable to ride out those fluctuations. You are allowed to set and keep boundaries. Start believing in yourself a little more right now, so you have to kick yourself a little less aggressively later. You have to give yourself a break. The ups and downs are just a natural part of what keeps things interesting. A period of struggle prepares you for a future of resilience. But those moments never last for too long. Even the most confident people are a little bit unsure and a little bit terrified sometimes. Having sex with them is not how you get them to like you. People are talking about it like it is terrible. Most of us make it out of the woods. Uncertainty is a key ingredient to the whole shebang. If not, what kind of living can he make? Your self-perception is going to adjust to encompass the new, adult you: Give yourself the chance to adjust to no longer living with a group of your closest friends yes, you will adjust.
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