Yes, I feel completely ready to have sex with my partner. When you do that, and you've got the chemistry, sex is more incredible than any other thing in the entire world. Doing so provides a good source of information as to your needs to be ready to have sex. I wanted it to be with someone whom I cared about, who cared about me and whom I was secure with. Your needs should be met without having to compromise yourself to please others. Because you might do it and then regret it. Many down-there conditions like vaginismus and vulvodynia can cause sexual pain. Are you SURE you want to go against your beliefs? Before you have sex with someone, you need to know all there is to know about STDs and STIs - how you can get them, if your possible partner has been tested, the symptoms of common STDs, etc. Know how you want to feel after you have sex.
A lot of girls do it for the emotional aspect. If you're having sex, you should feel comfortable talking about it, because sex is about communication just as much as it is about physical stuff. Are you and your partner willing to use contraception to prevent pregnancy and STIs? Some girls know and other girls take a lot of time to think about the decision to have sex—both are valid! If you're dating someone who has been pressuring you to take the next step, don't do it just because you want to make him happy. This is no big deal and should go away in a few days. For other girls, like Ann, a Collegiette at Roanoke College, she just felt deep down that it was the right time. No one taught us to trust our inner voices to make decisions. Tell me in the comments. When you do that, and you've got the chemistry, sex is more incredible than any other thing in the entire world. When you're ready, you should feel a little nervous, but also excited. Are you SURE you want to go against your beliefs? Were you excited that you might get caught doing it? It makes sense that as adults, we continue to look externally for guidance—but looking outside ourselves is dangerous because we are more likely to regret decisions when we base them on other people's beliefs and values. For Emily, a Collegiette at University of Virginia, sex was an option that required a bit of thinking first. I feel some pressure from others, including but not limited to my partner or my friends. You give your partner an opportunity to meet your needs by voicing them. Did you take things slowly? Do you know how to prevent pregnancy and STIs? Another part of you wants to walk away before you make a mess of things. Then think about the times you regretted it, or felt shame or guilt. Do you feel your partner would respect any decision you made about whether to have sex or not? Are you both mature enough to handle the consequences, good and bad, of sex? If you experience severe pain, set up an appointment with your gynecologist, who can help you target the cause of your pain and find possible treatments. Is your decision to have sex completely your own?
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